Dating Tips for Pursuing a Divorced Foreign Woman
She’s perfect — everything you want in a woman. She’s foreign, beautiful, and has an admirable set of values. And the chemistry, for the most part, is unreal. There’s only one caveat — she’s divorced and you’re not sure how to deal with that. And while you do feel that there’s this great attraction between you two, you can’t help but notice the hint of doubt in her eyes. Is this normal? Has she moved on? And is there room for you in her future?
If you’re a guy who wants to know how to build a romantic relationship with someone who is divorced, then here are a few dating tips for you:
How Do You Win Her Over?
The first thing that you need to do in order to successfully have a relationship with a woman who has been divorced is to be sure if that’s what you want. Someone who’s been burned once before might be somewhat more guarded, so you’ll have to put in more effort than you would have to with someone whose past is a little less complicated.
Showing her that you’re serious about her isn’t going to be enough. Her ex was serious about her, but she’s single again.
What can you do at this stage in dating to prove you’re a serious contender?
Communicate Openly
One of the biggest reasons that relationships fail is that people fail to communicate their needs in a relationship. So make sure to tell the woman that you’re courting what you need from her. Conversely, you also have to listen to what she tells you about what she needs. And you have to be honest about what exactly you can offer her, whether it be a better life in your country or just a better man in her life.
Make a Tangible Investment
Another way to show a woman that you are truly serious about being with her is to tangibly invest in the relationship. This doesn’t mean paying for dates or buying her gifts. This means getting started on the paperwork to marry her and get her through the immigration process.
Understanding Her Last Romantic Relationship
The next thing you need to do is figure out why her marriage ended. Was there a breakdown in communication? Did they just drift apart? You need to know how her previous marriage ended, and what mistakes were made so that you can avoid making those same mistakes.
If you want to make sure that your own relationship with her will be more successful than the one she had with her ex, then you need to figure out what went wrong so you’ll know what to do right.
The Parent Trap
You may also have to deal with her ex. If there are children involved, then that is going to complicate matters significantly, especially if you’re a foreign man. Imagine that you meet a woman who’s been divorced and they have a child with their ex.
Now imagine that you want to marry this woman and take her back home to live with you. She may want to bring her child with her. Her ex, the child’s father, may not agree with that and, depending on their custody agreement, he may be able to keep her child in the country.
The prospect of losing her child is going to make marriage to you seem a lot less desirable. There are three things that can solve this problem for the two of you.
Custody Agreement
The first is that the local courts rule in her favor and amend custody so that she can move to a foreign country and take the child(ren) with her.
Daddy Dearest
The second thing is that her ex agrees to let his child(ren) go live in a new home or even in a foreign country with his ex-wife’s new husband. This might be difficult, especially if pride gets in the way. But you can do this by convincing him that living in your country is going to offer his child(ren) the best possible shot at succeeding in life.
Living the Expat Life
The third way to get around an ex that won’t let his child leave the country is to settle in the country yourself. If you have a job, a business, or other commitments at home, this may not be feasible for you.
However, it’s an entirely different story if you’re retired. Moving to a new country might work in your favor since your dollars might stretch further in a foreign country than they would in the United States.
Your pension or your 401k or whatever money you’ve saved up for your retirement is going to be able to pay for a higher standard of living in a foreign country than it would in the United States. Depending on the local market, you could potentially get a beachfront property for the cost of a 1-bedroom apartment back home.
The Last Man
Then there’s the ex-husband himself. Some guys may divorce a woman and then regret it and then make it a point to win her back. You’re going to have to compete with him and he’s got an advantage since he probably knows her better than you do and they’ve got history.
But you also have an advantage in that you haven’t previously broken her heart. That history that they have together may have given him a better understanding of her, but it’s given her a better understanding of him.
On a side note, make sure that the divorce is well and truly finalized, not just in the emotional sense, but also in the legal sense. She may be over her ex totally, but unless all the paperwork has been properly filed and notarized, you’re not going to be able to marry her because a lot of countries do not recognize polyamorous marriages.
People go through seasons in life. Some seasons are good and they find what they believe is love, but that love sours or it turns into something more platonic. Or it just fades entirely. Then those same people try to find it again, and they realize that there might be people who want to find it with them.
If you’re in the latter group, you may find that dating people in the former can be hard. They’ve got a few walls up. But if you follow these few dating tips, you should be able to scale those walls eventually.
